I need to stop worrying abut Mi. Rae and I were out last night, drinking too much for either of our own good. At first, I wasn't sure I wanted to hang out and drink. But apparently, I did. Innocent was there too, and Jannes joined us later on. Innocent was flirting with me. He gave me a giant bear hug that totally cracked my back. In the good way.
When I told Rae that I was in a good place with Mi and that I'm starting to be OK with the open casual thing, she reminded me of something very important. Rae has been so awesome to me lately. She told me that no matter what, he needs to know just how lucky he is to be with me. I shouldn't only think that I'm the lucky one to be with him. I know myself well enough to see that I do that. I start to think of how I can bend. That's usually why it never works out in a romantic sense. I'm always the friend.
I like that I'm flexible. I like that I'm tolerant. I like that I'm the friend. But every now and then, I think... Where does it get me? I don't demand. I'm not high maintanance. If I don't ask for something, I don't get it.
Rae reminds me to be me. That awesomely cool person, who got Mi to notice her in the first place.